Urge to kill rising. Wally is Hangry (Hungry and therefore Angry, phrase brought to you by the Goates'). All I can think about is two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, whatever other stuff you want to put on and a sesame seed bun. The more I think about it the more inanimate objects turn into it. I think I've eaten a tape dispenser and the cushion to my already under padded office chair. There is only one thing that can stop me when this close to engaging in a feeding frenzy.
A Jedi. Jedi Master Qui Gon Jin once said "Your focus determines your reality." How true this is. If you ever get a chance to talk to a race car driver and you ask him about being afraid of crashing into the wall, chances are he will say that he doesn't look at the wall, he looks where he is driving next. You can infer from that logic that if you look at the wall while pushing 200 mph you will drive there. Quickly.
People have powerful minds but even with that power we still allow our appetites to lead and steer us. We are like a horse and the rider is a combination of our conscience, intellect, intuition and appetites. If we let our appetites override the three other parts then it will always steer us toward Burger King. So we keep our appetites in check by focusing with all our might on a very, very specific goal. I don't care if you are not an artist, draw your goal. If you need to cut and paste a picture of a muscly guys body with your head attached, then post it in a place that you will see it several times a day. When you look at it say "That is me in (however many days you have left to meet your goal)."
We will have cravings for what we are cutting out of our life. We may not feel like we have the willpower to lift the next weight or jog the next step. At those times, remember your goal. Your focus will determine your reality. You can't argue with a Jedi.
Friday, April 29, 2011
Thursday, April 28, 2011
The Great Walrus Hunt
Years ago, I had a friend who started calling me Wally. This was confusing to me at first and so I asked for an explanation. He shared with me that Wally was in fact the first part of a two part nickname that I had unknowingly earned. The second part? The Walrus. Yes, I was and am still to an extent Wally the Walrus. This was because I was fat and "Wallered around on the couch like a Walrus on the beach."
I think that throughout our lives we can relate our physicality to various animals. In the past I have been a lithe, agile and strong jungle cat. Nowadays, I am more of the Walrus/Manatee/Elephant Seal variety. When I lay on the couch and yell at the TV, there is not too much of a difference between me and a belligerent pinniped (Walrus or Seal). As a matter of fact if you covered me in fur and removed my ability to pronounce hard consonants it would be the same.
Case in point: I have played Turkey Bowl football on thanksgiving day for years. The past three thanksgivings have been in Indiana, and for roughly the past 5 thanksgivings I have been a Walrus. Now when a bull walrus is threatened and it is away from the water or guarding the other Walri (pronounced Wall-rye, plural form of walrus- also, a made up word) it charges the offender with the intent to crush him/her/them/it with his roughly 4,000lbs and then if possible gore the grease stain that was the offender repeatedly. This (or a close approximation of this) has happened every year I've played in the Turkey Bowl for the last four years. Inevitably I am chasing some poor (and much smaller) person as fast as Wally will let me. It usually ends with me trying my darnedest to get my mass to stop while Newton's Laws mock me. The aforementioned smaller person turns and sees certain doom speedily headed towards him. After an emergency evacuation of the large intestine there is a tremendous collision and I'm left cleaning up the parts of my victim in a 15-20 foot radius. The moral to this story? Being Wally has left me with less control of my body. But that's not all.
Wally has had too much of a say as to what goes on in the life of Travis. This morning while getting dressed for work I was watching a P90X infomercial. The following conversation took place in my head:
Travis: 'I need to get back to that whole P90X thing, that would really help me cut this weight off.'
Wally: (In the voice of Bullwinkle the moose) 'Uh, that looks like a lot of work. We should probably go eat some McDonalds for breakfast instead.'
Travis: 'No Wally! I had yogurt for breakfast this morning and Nikki said no fast food. Do you not remember me Scouting it yesterday?'
Wally: ' That was a decision I was against the whole time. Eat a McGriddle, then take a nap. It will feel a lot better.'
Wally is an opponent to the whole concept behind weight loss. At first he's just a little whiner, but as I continue to cut portion size and calorie intake Wally becomes a raging beast. He gets to be pretty difficult to deal with. Wally turns me into a highly irritable person for a few weeks while my stomach shrinks back to a more normal size. Luckily for me my wife is very understanding and knows how and when to keep Wally in check.
Walri have few natural predators: Polar bear, and killer whales. Wally has no predators. Until now. I've given Wally notice, and while I know he will not go without a fight I'm going to harpoon him and turn him into a nice comfy pair of mukluks. Goodbye Wally the Walrus, hello Travis the Tiger.
I think that throughout our lives we can relate our physicality to various animals. In the past I have been a lithe, agile and strong jungle cat. Nowadays, I am more of the Walrus/Manatee/Elephant Seal variety. When I lay on the couch and yell at the TV, there is not too much of a difference between me and a belligerent pinniped (Walrus or Seal). As a matter of fact if you covered me in fur and removed my ability to pronounce hard consonants it would be the same.
Case in point: I have played Turkey Bowl football on thanksgiving day for years. The past three thanksgivings have been in Indiana, and for roughly the past 5 thanksgivings I have been a Walrus. Now when a bull walrus is threatened and it is away from the water or guarding the other Walri (pronounced Wall-rye, plural form of walrus- also, a made up word) it charges the offender with the intent to crush him/her/them/it with his roughly 4,000lbs and then if possible gore the grease stain that was the offender repeatedly. This (or a close approximation of this) has happened every year I've played in the Turkey Bowl for the last four years. Inevitably I am chasing some poor (and much smaller) person as fast as Wally will let me. It usually ends with me trying my darnedest to get my mass to stop while Newton's Laws mock me. The aforementioned smaller person turns and sees certain doom speedily headed towards him. After an emergency evacuation of the large intestine there is a tremendous collision and I'm left cleaning up the parts of my victim in a 15-20 foot radius. The moral to this story? Being Wally has left me with less control of my body. But that's not all.
Wally has had too much of a say as to what goes on in the life of Travis. This morning while getting dressed for work I was watching a P90X infomercial. The following conversation took place in my head:
Travis: 'I need to get back to that whole P90X thing, that would really help me cut this weight off.'
Wally: (In the voice of Bullwinkle the moose) 'Uh, that looks like a lot of work. We should probably go eat some McDonalds for breakfast instead.'
Travis: 'No Wally! I had yogurt for breakfast this morning and Nikki said no fast food. Do you not remember me Scouting it yesterday?'
Wally: ' That was a decision I was against the whole time. Eat a McGriddle, then take a nap. It will feel a lot better.'
Wally is an opponent to the whole concept behind weight loss. At first he's just a little whiner, but as I continue to cut portion size and calorie intake Wally becomes a raging beast. He gets to be pretty difficult to deal with. Wally turns me into a highly irritable person for a few weeks while my stomach shrinks back to a more normal size. Luckily for me my wife is very understanding and knows how and when to keep Wally in check.
Walri have few natural predators: Polar bear, and killer whales. Wally has no predators. Until now. I've given Wally notice, and while I know he will not go without a fight I'm going to harpoon him and turn him into a nice comfy pair of mukluks. Goodbye Wally the Walrus, hello Travis the Tiger.
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Scouting It
Last night as I was lying on my couch I was thinking about a couple of things.
1- Was taking the "high road" and eating a few tangerines instead of having fishsticks with my wife a wise idea?
2- Were there any fishsticks left over? (If yes see 2b)
2b- Would they taste good with ketchup? (Answer: Everything tastes good with enough ketchup.)
3- What can help me be successful in getting skinny this time instead of ending in another failure?
I was thinking about some of the posts on my facebook after putting up day one. (Thanks for reading by the way!) The general consensus seems to be that people get tired of being tired. Being overweight certainly is not an invigorating experience and after trying my hand at any physical activity these days I am exhausted and disappointed in my performance. Those results make absolute sense when you consider I'm literally carrying the weight of another person.
I do not like dividing my life's timeline into Pre-Fat and Fat eras. I'm too young for my glory days to be in the past. We all are. So what to do?
About ten years ago I noticed a phenomenon occurring within my little brothers' group of friends. I largely avoided this group because my brothers and I didn't get along and therefore I didn't get along with their friends, but what I noticed during this time has made a lasting impression on my life. As guys do they would tell each other something " I did xy and z", or "She said that...." and inevitably everyone in the group would call bull. The person telling the story would then begin to attempt to convince the others of the truth, "No man, I PROMISE that I did xy and z", or "Dude, I SWEAR she said that!!!!". No dice, the others would still largely be in disbelief. Three words would change that. "I scout it." This combined with the scout hand sign of right hand up to the square with the index, middle and ring fingers pointed up while the pinkie and the thumb curled to the center of the palm, locked in the promise. The entire groups demeanor changed and the teller was then totally believed.
To them Boy Scouts was largely a joke, but the oath of "Scouting It" was deadly serious. I have been thinking about that ever since and have come up with it's practical application in my life. The official Boy Scout Oath begins with "On My Honor..." and then lists a series of promises. Scouting it is the most severe non religious promise one can make to me because it involves my honor and keeping it intact. What better way to commit to losing weight?
So today I am Scouting It.
I will not drink any more soda or energy drinks.
I will not eat over 1800 calories in a day.
I will not go back for seconds.
I will not eat fast food.
I will work out 2-3 times a week for at least an hour per session.
I will lose this weight.
On My Honor, I Scout It.
I wish this entry was more humorous. They will be in the future, but when making decisions like this we must be deadly serious. Feel free to comment, or post what you Scout It to do.
1- Was taking the "high road" and eating a few tangerines instead of having fishsticks with my wife a wise idea?
2- Were there any fishsticks left over? (If yes see 2b)
2b- Would they taste good with ketchup? (Answer: Everything tastes good with enough ketchup.)
3- What can help me be successful in getting skinny this time instead of ending in another failure?
I was thinking about some of the posts on my facebook after putting up day one. (Thanks for reading by the way!) The general consensus seems to be that people get tired of being tired. Being overweight certainly is not an invigorating experience and after trying my hand at any physical activity these days I am exhausted and disappointed in my performance. Those results make absolute sense when you consider I'm literally carrying the weight of another person.
I do not like dividing my life's timeline into Pre-Fat and Fat eras. I'm too young for my glory days to be in the past. We all are. So what to do?
About ten years ago I noticed a phenomenon occurring within my little brothers' group of friends. I largely avoided this group because my brothers and I didn't get along and therefore I didn't get along with their friends, but what I noticed during this time has made a lasting impression on my life. As guys do they would tell each other something " I did xy and z", or "She said that...." and inevitably everyone in the group would call bull. The person telling the story would then begin to attempt to convince the others of the truth, "No man, I PROMISE that I did xy and z", or "Dude, I SWEAR she said that!!!!". No dice, the others would still largely be in disbelief. Three words would change that. "I scout it." This combined with the scout hand sign of right hand up to the square with the index, middle and ring fingers pointed up while the pinkie and the thumb curled to the center of the palm, locked in the promise. The entire groups demeanor changed and the teller was then totally believed.
To them Boy Scouts was largely a joke, but the oath of "Scouting It" was deadly serious. I have been thinking about that ever since and have come up with it's practical application in my life. The official Boy Scout Oath begins with "On My Honor..." and then lists a series of promises. Scouting it is the most severe non religious promise one can make to me because it involves my honor and keeping it intact. What better way to commit to losing weight?
So today I am Scouting It.
I will not drink any more soda or energy drinks.
I will not eat over 1800 calories in a day.
I will not go back for seconds.
I will not eat fast food.
I will work out 2-3 times a week for at least an hour per session.
I will lose this weight.
On My Honor, I Scout It.
I wish this entry was more humorous. They will be in the future, but when making decisions like this we must be deadly serious. Feel free to comment, or post what you Scout It to do.
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
Day One: I eat because I'm Fat, and I'm Fat because I eat.
Dear whoever is reading this. This blog is an effort to document the thoughts/feelings/trials/temptations of a fat guy (Travis Treanor) on his road back to skinnyhood. This blog will be humorous so if you don't like humor you may want to reconsider reading this.
Right now I'm sitting at about 280-ish pounds. This would not be a problem if I was a 6'8" defensive end in the NFL. For those of you who don't know me (how are you reading this?) I am 6' tall and avidly watch the NFL. Now the problem with being this variety of physical specimen are many, however I am not going to write about the health aspects of things, I am going to write about my thoughts and experiences in trying to get skinny. That being said: being overweight is not good for your health.
This morning I woke up with the vision of doughnuts dancing about in my head. Few things in this world are as dangerous as a fat person who wants a doughnut when there are none to be had.Luckily for us neither my twin children nor my wife are even remotely doughnut-esque and so they were and are safe. The only things that looked like donuts were the multi grain cheerios in my cabinet. I like honey nut cheerios because I don't have to add sugar to them, but my wife buys the multi grain variety because they are healthier.
Mary Poppins once said that "A spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down!" In my studies I have found that multi grain cheerios require roughly 3 to 4 spoonfuls (depending on your taste and the time of day). Even with the requisite sugar infusion cheerios are a disappointing breakfast venture for a person like myself. I'm more of a sausage-egg-and-cheese mcgriddle type. Hash browns? Yes please!
I got to work to find that a brand new KFC has opened up next to my office, which would usually be an exciting event for me. It is instead a special form of torture that I get to go through, as my wife game me the 'No fast food' talk yesterday with accompanying stink eye. Today will be rough.
Right now I'm sitting at about 280-ish pounds. This would not be a problem if I was a 6'8" defensive end in the NFL. For those of you who don't know me (how are you reading this?) I am 6' tall and avidly watch the NFL. Now the problem with being this variety of physical specimen are many, however I am not going to write about the health aspects of things, I am going to write about my thoughts and experiences in trying to get skinny. That being said: being overweight is not good for your health.
This morning I woke up with the vision of doughnuts dancing about in my head. Few things in this world are as dangerous as a fat person who wants a doughnut when there are none to be had.Luckily for us neither my twin children nor my wife are even remotely doughnut-esque and so they were and are safe. The only things that looked like donuts were the multi grain cheerios in my cabinet. I like honey nut cheerios because I don't have to add sugar to them, but my wife buys the multi grain variety because they are healthier.
Mary Poppins once said that "A spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down!" In my studies I have found that multi grain cheerios require roughly 3 to 4 spoonfuls (depending on your taste and the time of day). Even with the requisite sugar infusion cheerios are a disappointing breakfast venture for a person like myself. I'm more of a sausage-egg-and-cheese mcgriddle type. Hash browns? Yes please!
I got to work to find that a brand new KFC has opened up next to my office, which would usually be an exciting event for me. It is instead a special form of torture that I get to go through, as my wife game me the 'No fast food' talk yesterday with accompanying stink eye. Today will be rough.
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